What's worse than a dead lawyer?

A living one.

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What's better, Star Wars or Star Trek?

Answer: Knowing what intimacy with another living human being feels like.

Who wears robes, cuts off people's hands, and lives in the desert?

Obi-Wan Kenobi.

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What's worse than a dead lawyer?

A living one.

What's the difference between dead animals on the road and dead lawyers on the road?

Dead animals have skid marks AROUND them