Where's the best place to buy jive cheese?

Monterey, Jack!

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Why did the old man buy his wig at the thrift store?

Because he didn't want toupee.

What do aliens use to buy their coffee?

starbucks

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Why is the topmost floor the best place to drink in?

That's how you set the bar high.

Why is the KKK a good place to find a job?

Cos they'll always hook a brutha up

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What sound does a frog make while jacking off?

Rubbit Rubbit

How does Harry Houdini tell people to steal stuff?

Straight jack it.