Why can't Brock Turner go to jail?

Because with swim times like his, he might be president some day.

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What did Santa get the day after Christmas?

Diabetes

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A barber!

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How did the U. S. elect an Orange as president?

Gerrymandarin.

Why do presidents have unsatisfied wives?

It takes four years to get an election.

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What happens when you shoot a black man?

You go to jail for impersonating a police officer...

What do you call a group of environmentalists in jail?

Collared Greens'

Brock Turner Jokes More Brock Turner Jokes

What do Microsoft updates and Brock Turner have in common?

They install at night, while you are asleep, without consent.

Why can't Brock Turner go to jail?

Because with swim times like his, he might be president some day.