Why couldn't the spotty cat chase the sheep?

Because her Mum wouldn't leopard be a shepherd

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Chase Jokes More Chase Jokes

Why did the leper chase the leopard?

Because she wanted the D. (I dreamed this joke last night. Not bad for a dream joke.)

How can if you have a stupid dog ?

It chases parked cars !

Sheep Jokes More Sheep Jokes

What's the difference between the 2016 presidential debates and a pen of baboons relentlessly fighting over the dead stinking corpse of a sheep?

Microphones!

What do you get if you cross a dog and a sheep ?

A sheep that can round itself up !

Mum Jokes More Mum Jokes

Why is Grace never thirsty?

Because she's always drinking from the coup de Grace. (This was my sister's favourite joke when we were kids. Once our mum flipped out on a long car journey because she told it too many times).

Why are you watching Thatcher's funeral?

Mum: "Just to make sure"

Leopard Jokes More Leopard Jokes

Why didn't the leopard go on vacation?

It couldn't find the right spot.

Why couldn't the spotty cat chase the sheep?

Because her Mum wouldn't leopard be a shepherd

Shepherd Jokes More Shepherd Jokes

What did the shepherd's wife say to the shepherd?

You herd.

How are the band "The Scorpions" and rural shepherds alike?

They just wanna be loved by ewe. Made up this joke/pun at work the other day (I'm sure I'm not the first), decided to subject you all to it. All apologies to shepherds who are not physical with your sheep.