Why did the calendar die?

It's days were numbered.

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Day Jokes More Day Jokes

What did the pay phone say when the quarter got stuck inside it?

Money's tight these days!

What's Snoop Dogg's favorite time of day?

Tree O'clock!

Die Jokes More Die Jokes

What does my mom and a turkey have in common?

They both died on Thanksgiving

Why didn't the Asian man cry when his wife died?

Because he just couldn't bereave it.

Number Jokes More Number Jokes

How do you change the number of sides on a Pentagon?

Intersect it with a plane.

What did number 2 say to number 1?

you're an odd fellow

Calendar Jokes More Calendar Jokes

Why did the calendar give up on life?

Because he felt his days were numbered.

Whats the difference between me and a calendar?

A calendar has dates.