THIS IS NOT A JOKE I'm sure you all have heard the joke where has a number for each joke and that everyone just remembers the numbers instead for typing out the jokes. This always made me think "What would joke #1 be?" What do you think it'd be?
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Coffee Mug
High Five
It's too square.
I'd say it's fifty fifty
A huge mess.
Because 7 8 10.
It's not, numbers don't have emotions.
YEEEEAAAAH! GO CEILING! YOU NUMBER ONE BABY! WOOOOOOHOOOOOO!
The same number it takes to screw public confidence in law enforcement
They insist your safe word has an upper case letter, a lower case letter, and at least one number.
You never can tell. The Sandpeople always ride in single file to hide their numbers.
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February... because it has the least number of days
The of the Beast.
Because Demeter stopped working.
Because it's two gross! (A gross is a measurement unit for "144". So 2 * 144 = 288. Or "two gross".)
The odds are against them.
Because it's his only chance to open the door to Number 10!
82
Intersect it with a plane.
Nice belt. :)
2 Source: My discrete professor
Because movie makers are basically doing a number 2.
Because they're all about number one
Because 7 8 9.
Because 7 8 9!
To crunch numbers.
Because 789
They literally can't even.
Because in charge of the numbers, Yoda was
It's days were numbered!
9-1-2001
Because he only ever takes sum of the numbers!
The umpire called it: nine won one.
GerMany
The stepmother, because sometimes you want to hit her, even though you shouldn't
96
420
Math hue.
He counted 1 Mississippi, 2 Mississippi, 3 Mississippi, 4 Mississippi...
They both can't even.
Because it was a Number 2.
Eh, it's some number you've probably never heard of.
No one knows. They ride single file to hide their numbers.
GO CEILING!!! WHOOOHOOO!!!! YOUR NUMBER ONE!! YAY, CEILING RULES!!!
because
A roamin' numeral. :P
A: Because she didn't know which one came first!
Why are you skipping numbers girl 1: Because I can't even!!!
They're not infallible
A pin.
Hmmm........I'll just do a few numbers and get back to you
104
you're an odd fellow
Nice belt."
Because after 90 days in Mexico, even they try to enter the US illegally.
Its just that...your numbers not in it.
It got stuck in 9/11
A stable economy...
Because he felt his days were numbered.
Because 7 ate 9.
Someone else yells "Call 911!" The blonde yells back "What's the number "
As many as 27. I'm referring to the number of times good ol' 27 was reposted.
for 2 weeks.
Dancing With the Stars is on and I need to make sure this will be enough.
Because the only numbers in them are page numbers.
One's a prime number, the other's a prime minister.
It's days were numbered.
I like your belt
e
I can't even
A roamin' numeral.
I've learned to add up the zeros but the numbers are still giving me trouble.
I can't even...
Testicles.
Because his number couldn't fit in their phones
Here's 10 reasons why I should get the job "ok" Number 7 will shock you "You're hired"
You convert it to Islam.
Only once, and then you are subtracting it from 20.
Because seven ate nine.
If you know the number, you don't know where the socket is.
The number of the car that hit him.
The number of the car that hit you.
Let's get rational you can't carry on like this!
Crimea river
13. Number 9 will shock you!
M partner works in IT? They insist your safe word has an upper case letter, a lower case letter, and at least one number.
iPhone. - No, I meant the number. - It's a 6. - No, to contact you. - I don't use it for that.
Because it's undefined.
His days were numbered.
I'm lichen what I see"
Changed its status from 'In A Relationship' to 'Single'.
187
13\. Number 9 will shock you!
Because he is 2 square.
Add the letter G and it’s “gone”!
They do Yoda.
Gladiator Get it? Glad He Ate Her..
Because the cons outweighed the prose.
The plot.
They thought 7 was pretty odd.
Because 7 8 9 A
Me: Once a coworker said "supposably" 7 times in a meeting & I just let her StP: Get in here
Because somebody divided 14 into 2 and he was the prime suspect
Lettuce alone, without dressing. I remembered this today from a joke book I had when I was a kid. Wasn't sure if it should be here or /r/dadjokes
Forget it once.
In a football match, the best team wins.
Because when their opponent makes a point, they always respond with a valid counterpoint.
They use Bootox.
Leonardo DiCaprio's Oscar shelf.
