Why did the kid only water half the lawn?

Because there was a 50% chance of rain

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Kid Jokes More Kid Jokes

How do kids from chernobyl count to a 100?

On their fingers

What did the pirate say when his kids were about to watch their favorite cartoon?

ARE YE READY KIDS !

50 Jokes More 50 Jokes

What's it like to tweet "My cat sneezed" and get 500 RT in the first minute ?

My cat would be dead before I got 50

What has 200 legs 50 noses and is very loud?

A herd of stampeding aardvarks!

Rain Jokes More Rain Jokes

What is Santa saying to Mrs. Claus right now?

I told you it would rain, dear.

Why did it rain on Christmas Eve?

Because of Santa and his Raindeer.

Half Jokes More Half Jokes

What would Paul McCartney say after losing both his legs?

Suddenly....I'm not half the man I used to be....."

What's worse than finding half a worm in an apple?

Finding a vein in a hot dog.