Why did the kleptomaniac dislike the insultingly boisterous man with a cleft palate?

He couldn't take any more lip!

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Lip Jokes More Lip Jokes

How did the mobster burn his lips on a tailpipe?

He tried to blow up a police car.

What goes oo ooo oooo?

A cow with no lips.

Kleptomaniac Jokes More Kleptomaniac Jokes

What do you call someone who takes everything literally?

A kleptomaniac!

Why don't kleptomaniacs get puns?

Because they always take things literally.

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Why did the kleptomaniac dislike the insultingly boisterous man with a cleft palate?

He couldn't take any more lip!

Why do dogs hate outer space?

Because they strongly dislike vacuums.