How did the mobster burn his lips on a tailpipe?

He tried to blow up a police car.

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Burn Jokes More Burn Jokes

What's the difference between smoking weed and burning the koran?

If you burn the koran, you can only get stoned once.

Why do people call their weed the Koran?

Because if your burn it, it gets you stoned

Try Jokes More Try Jokes

How do you greet an overweight Micronesian when you're trying to sound cool?

Microsoft Word.

Why is he 50m from where he got shot?

Our best guess was he tried crawling home to clear his browser history"

Blow Jokes More Blow Jokes

What do "fake news" and isis have in common?

They're blowing up everyone's newsfeed

Who's there ! Bronte ! Bronte who ?

Bronte of the blow !

Police Car Jokes More Police Car Jokes

What the difference between a police car and a porcupine?

With a police car, the pricks are on the inside

Why did the blonde try and steal a police car?

A: She saw "911" on the back and thought it was a Porsche.

Lip Jokes More Lip Jokes

How many lips does a flower have?

Tulips

Why does Helen Keller wear tight jeans?

So people can read her lips.

Mobster Jokes More Mobster Jokes

Where did the mobster go to college?

Whas-a-matta U.

Why didn't the mobsters car parts fit?

they all fell off a truck.