How did the mobster burn his lips on a tailpipe?

He tried to blow up a police car.

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Burn Jokes More Burn Jokes

Why is something that keeps you from burning your fingers on a joint called a roach clip?

Because potholder was already taken

Why did you burn that building down?

Me: Because they keep sending emails after unsubscribing. Cop: You're free to go.

Try Jokes More Try Jokes

Why did the goat stop trying to break out of jail?

Because he was just tired of being an escape goat.

What have you done wrong if the wife keep complaining when you try to watch TV in the living room?

You made the chain too long in the kitchen.

Blow Jokes More Blow Jokes

Why does it always seem like models' hair is blowing in the wind?

They have big fans.

Why don't Mexicans blow their noses?

So that they have something to pick in the off-season.

Police Car Jokes More Police Car Jokes

Why did the blonde try and steal a police car?

A: She saw "911" on the back and thought it was a Porsche.

What do women and police cars have in common?

They both make a lot of noise to let you know they are coming.

Lip Jokes More Lip Jokes

Why can't you hear a dog whistle?

Because they have a hard time puckering their lips the right way.

How do you blow a movie quote?

You just put your lips together and whistle

Mobster Jokes More Mobster Jokes

What did the mobster call it when he couldn't move his dead friend's body?

Rigatoni!

Why did the mobster buy a planner?

So he could organize his crime