Why do I always seem to start my day backwards?

I wake up tired and I go to bed wide awake

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Why was Stalin a Bad leader?

Because he was staling a country that was rushing..(Russia) This joke was bad. Im going to bed now.

What do you tell a diabetic girl in bed?

Hi sugar

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How do you feel when your phone suddenly starts blaring your least favorite tune?

Alarmed.

When's the best time of day to start a diet?

4:00 For:Klock

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What is the name of your Russian coworker you see the next day?

C. U. Tomorov

Why was the blond late on her first day of work?

Because she stopped taking the pill about a month earlier.

Wake Jokes More Wake Jokes

How do you know when there is a snowman in your bed ?

You wake up wet !

What time does a mechanic wake up?

Oily!