How badly?

ME: I want you checking thesaurus in a panic haphazardly

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Why was the pig unhappy in the Minors?

Because he wants to play in the Pig Leagues.

How many sociologists does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but the light bulb has to want to change.

Check Jokes More Check Jokes

What if the missing plane is still up there?

What " Did you check the sky "No." See, this is why you'll never advance, Kevin.

Why did the redditor stand on a piece of fruit to check his weight?

BECAUSE HE WAS USING A BANANA FOR SCALE

Thesaurus Jokes More Thesaurus Jokes

What's another word for "thesaurus"?

Steven Wright joke, iirc.

What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary?

A Thesaurus.

Panic Jokes More Panic Jokes

Why'd the guy panic and call 911 when he realized an ocean was forming around him?

It was an emergent sea.

How badly?

ME: I want you checking thesaurus in a panic haphazardly