How do you poison a hipster?

Gluten

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Poison Jokes More Poison Jokes

Who poisoned the waters in the 2016 Olympics?

It was I, **RIO**!!!

Why do you give children who swallowed poison some milk?

To make them happy before they die.

Hipster Jokes More Hipster Jokes

Why was the hipster so successful in the stock market?

He invested before it was cool.

Why did the hipster only listen to dead musicians?

So he could say he listened to them when they were underground.

Gluten Jokes More Gluten Jokes

Why are gluten-free children so healthy?

Because they're not inbred.

What's the fastest way to ruin free pie?

Put the word 'gluten' at the beginning