How is your job and your wife different?

I don't mind telling work the other jobs I've done

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Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What is the difference between the deflate gate controversy and my wife?

Only one shows an interest in the balls.

What's the difference between a wife and a mistress?

A: About fifty pounds.

Mind Jokes More Mind Jokes

What's warm, white, and I drink almost every night?

Warm milk before bed... Get your mind out of the gutter!

What do you call a water fowl looking in a window?

Peking duck. (it came to mind over dinner... I thought I would share the pain with everyone)

Work Jokes More Work Jokes

How are black people like Christmas lights?

Half of them don't work and the ones that do aren't that bright

What do fish talk about at work?

Current events

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

How do you tell if your Billy Idol fan girlfriend has a Three Stooges fetish?

In the midnight hour she cried "Moe! Moe! Moe!"

What does a quantum physicist tell their toddler who keeps asking "Why" over and over?

Because I saw so."

Job Jokes More Job Jokes

Why can't the man take his job seriously?

Because he's a clown! Buh bum tis

What's awkward for a man but a normal part of the job for a lumberjack?

Morning wood.