What did Ted Cruz's wife get after being elbowed by him?

A Ted Bruz

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What do you call a foreign born communist running for President?

Ted Cruz

Why do people take such an instant dislike to Ted Cruz ?

It saves so much time.

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Why did the dog have a gleam in his eye?

Someone bumped his elbow while he was brushing his teeth.

Why is it called the "funny bone" when you hit your elbow on something and it tingles?

Because it's humerus.