What did the diligent whore get for Christmas?

lots and lots of karma

This joke may have profanity.

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What am I not taking on Christmas this year?

Noels

What kind of present did the armless boy get for Christmas?

Gloves. Jk he hasn't opened it yet!!

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What does Apu say when people leave him to browse reddit?

Thank you, Karma gain

What's the one thing missing from the offensive jokes on r/jokes?

Karma, Whores.

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How do you make a violin sound like a viola?

A: Play in the low register with a lot of wrong notes.

How did the hail stone describe it's life?

It really has a lot of ups and downs