What did the snake say when he was offered a piece of cheese for dinner?

Thank you I'll just have a slither.

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Thank Jokes More Thank Jokes

Who am I to argue?

So I thanked him and went back home.

How did your first day as a lifeguard go?

Me: "Amazingly well, thanks. Everyone was so friendly and waving at me."

Snake Jokes More Snake Jokes

What do you call a snake that's 3.14 metres long?

A thon

What do you get if you cross two snakes with a magic spell ?

Addercadabra and abradacobra !

Piece Jokes More Piece Jokes

What do you call a piece of fruit that can fly?

A pearrot

How do you get a 300 pound woman into bed?

piece of cake

Cheese Jokes More Cheese Jokes

What do you call a quaterpounder with cheese in Zimbabwe?

A yeast infection!

What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of its cage?

Camembert

Dinner Jokes More Dinner Jokes

What does a black and white bear use to cook it's dinner?

A pan, duh!

What do you call a Mexican ready-meal?

Dinner for Juan

Offer Jokes More Offer Jokes

Why should you work for a vegetable factory?

Because they offer a good celery.

How many American golf fans does it take to change a lightbulb?

1001 1 to offer up the bulb and 1000 to scream 'Get in the hole'