What did the woman do when a lemon tree fell her cat?

Nothing, she just stood there with a sour puss

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Fall Jokes More Fall Jokes

What do people and trees have in common?

They both fall down when you hit them with an axe.

Why was the United Nations concerned when the waitress dropped the platter on Thanksgiving?

It meant the fall of Turkey, the ruin of Greece, and the breakup of China.

Cat Jokes More Cat Jokes

What do you call a cat that claims it's a lion crossed with a cougar?

A liar.

What animal is two animals at the same time?

The Cat: because is a cat and a spider :) ... oh, wait.

Stand Jokes More Stand Jokes

What do you call ten Frenchmen who stand in front of their goalie for 90 minutes?

Dix.

What do you call it when a person acts holy for a night then sins every day after?

A one night stand with Jesus

Woman Jokes More Woman Jokes

What can hunger do that a woman simply can't?

Drive me to the grocery store.

Why do you never buy a woman a watch?

Because there's a clock on the stove.

Lemon Tree Jokes More Lemon Tree Jokes

Where did you get so many lemons?

Holmes replies, "A lemon tree, Watson.."

What the hell is that?

Sherlock responds, "A lemon tree my dear Watson."