What do you want your husbands gravestone to say?

Wife: "Nothing. I want a traditional, non-talking one."

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

How do you sell a chicken to someone who is hard of hearing?

HEY! DO YOU WANT TO BUY A CHICKEN!?!?!

Why do you want to join the Secret Service?

Me: "It's a secret." Job interviewer: "You got the job."

Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What does Santa say when he meets your wife, your sister and your mother?

HO HO HO, Merry Christmas!

What was the engineer's reaction to his wife being too heavy?

Cantilever? (can't I leave her)

Talk Jokes More Talk Jokes

What's up with all these idiots on TV trying to talk to ghosts?

I don't even wanna talk to the living.

What did the dolphin say to the frog?

Eeeee eeee eeeee ieeeee eeee eee. Dolphins don't talk dummy.

Husband Jokes More Husband Jokes

Whenever we keep the money in the bags our son steals it, I don't know what to do?

Husband : Keep it in his books. I know he will never touch them....

Why did the Amish woman divorce her husband?

Because he was driving her buggy.