What does its job only after its been fired?

A bullet.

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Bullet Jokes More Bullet Jokes

Who slept with my wife?

and in the background someone replied "You ain't got enough bullets."

What will it take to reunite Nirvana?

Two more bullets.

Fire Jokes More Fire Jokes

What's left of a garden after it catches on fire?

Chard remains.

Why did the worker on the egg farm get fired from his job?

Because he had a crack addiction.

Job Jokes More Job Jokes

What job do you never stop training for?

Conductor

What do you say to a chav that has got a job?

Bigmac and fries please