What have I got in my hands?

A double decker bus! You looked!

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Look Jokes More Look Jokes

Why are blondes bad a judging distance?

They have no idea what 12 inches actually looks like. I for some reason could not find a way to phrase this any better. Credit to my coworker.

How many bodybuilders does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

It takes four. One to screw in the bulb, and three others to watch and say, "Really dude, you look huge!"

Hand Jokes More Hand Jokes

How do you offend a vegan?

Cover your ears with your hands

How long did you spend on your cosplay?

Me: Seven months A: *Hands me a badge marked "Casual"*

Double Decker Bus Jokes More Double Decker Bus Jokes

Why should you never sit at the top deck of a double decker bus?

Because there is no driver up there.

What do you call a man with a double decker bus on his head ?

The deceased !