What is it that you are both most fearful of?

WIFE: I just...sobbing...don't want the kids to suffer ME: Eels

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

What is your best casino joke?

I work in a casino and want to hear your best one. Here is mine: what's the difference between a canoe and a baccarat player? A canoe sometimes tips!

Why did the Mexican food go to counseling?

He wanted to taco bout his problems

Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What did the pirate say when his wife kept asking him about the steering wheel in his pants?

Yargg! Woman! Stop asking me! You're driving me nuts!"

Why did the stoner take his wife to court?

He wanted to get joint custody.

Kid Jokes More Kid Jokes

Why did the kid cross the playground?

To get to the other slide. Edit: spelling.

How a husband describe his wife?

Wife: "How would you describe me?" Husband: "ABCDEFGHIJK." Wife: "What does that mean?" Husband: "Adorable, beautiful, cute, delightful, elegant, fashionable, gorgeous, and hot." Wife: "Aw, thank you, but what about IJK?" Husband: "I'm just kidding!"

Suffer Jokes More Suffer Jokes

What happened to the performer who read poetry to terminally ill patients?

He suffered an elegiac reaction.

What does Ukraine have in common with the iPhone 7?

They both suffered the loss of one very important port.

Eel Jokes More Eel Jokes

What kind of eel is this?

Diner at the sushi restaurant: "What kind of eel is this?" Waiter: "Do you love it?" Diner: "yeah" Waiter: "Then, that's a moray"

Why can't an eel and an eagle team up?

Because it would be eel-eagle!

Sob Jokes More Sob Jokes

What kind of ship never sinks?

A dictatorship. *sobs*

Who will I share the sunset with now?

sobs* Friend: Bad breakup Me: No. *wipes tears* My Instagram isn't working.