What is it that you are both most fearful of?

WIFE: I just...sobbing...don't want the kids to suffer ME: Eels

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Which do you want to hear first?

Paul: I have good news and bad news. Which do you want to hear first? Michael: The good news. Paul: The good news is that I have no bad news.

What does a muslim man call a woman he wants to sleep with, but can't due to religious reasons?

Harambae

Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

How many hillbillies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

2. A man, his wife, and his cousin

How did the hippie remember the number of wives he had?

He counted 1 Mississippi, 2 Mississippi, 3 Mississippi, 4 Mississippi...

Kid Jokes More Kid Jokes

What do you get when a Mexican and Muslim have a child?

A kid who loves halalpenos

What do mentally retarded parents give their kids?

Hand me Downs.

Suffer Jokes More Suffer Jokes

What do accountants suffer from that ordinary people don't?

Depreciation.

What do women that have miscarried suffer from?

Mourning Sickness.

Eel Jokes More Eel Jokes

What kind of eel is this?

Diner at the sushi restaurant: "What kind of eel is this?" Waiter: "Do you love it?" Diner: "yeah" Waiter: "Then, that's a moray"

Why can't an eel and an eagle team up?

Because it would be eel-eagle!

Sob Jokes More Sob Jokes

Why were the 5 gorgeous young blonde Danish fashion models sobbing their eyes out?

I told them I wasn't going to give birth to them.

Who will I share the sunset with now?

sobs* Friend: Bad breakup Me: No. *wipes tears* My Instagram isn't working.