What is the best way to talk to a vampire?

By long distance.

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Talk Jokes More Talk Jokes

Why are you wrapping me up like a burrito & how did you find a tortilla this big?

Me: Shhh! This is my fantasy & burritos don't talk.

Why are none talking in the ladies sauna?

They are sitting on their lips!

Good Way Jokes More Good Way Jokes

What's the best way to get to the front page?

Post good stuff. Please up vote To FP!

What is the best way to get over a guy/girl?

Truck.

Vampire Jokes More Vampire Jokes

What's the definition of gross?

Two vampires fighting over a used tampon

How does a vampire get through life with only one fang?

He has to grin and bare it.

Long Distance Jokes More Long Distance Jokes

Who was that on the phone Fred?

Fred: No one important. Just some man who said it was long distance from Australia so I told him I knew that already and put the phone down !

What's the difference between Americans and Brits?

Brits think 200 miles is a long distance, Americans think 200 years is a long time.