What's six inches long, has two nuts, and gives women big bellies?

Almond Joy.

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Woman Jokes More Woman Jokes

Why can't rock climbing instructors get dates?

Because they rappel men and women.

How does the modern-day James Bond prefer his women?

Shaven, not furred

Nut Jokes More Nut Jokes

What do you call a group of scientologist almonds?

Nuts.

Which nut is the angriest?

The pistachio.

Inch Jokes More Inch Jokes

How are blizzards and men alike?

You don't know when they're coming, you don't know how many inches you'll get, and you don't know long they'll last

Why can't your nose be twelve inches long?

Because then it'd be a foot