What's the difference between the calendar and you?

A calendar has a date on Valentine's day.

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What is the difference between a dog and a viola?

A: The dog knows when to stop scratching.

What is the difference between falling from the 2nd floor and the 20th floor?

The 2nd floor: (SPLAT) AAAAAaaaaaaaagggghhhhhhhhhhh...... The 20th floor: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaahhhhhhhh!!! (SPLAT)

Date Jokes More Date Jokes

Why couldn't the Chinese geologist find a date?

He was vehemently opposed to wrong rocks on the beach.

Why should you never date a vegan girl?

She won't swallow.

Valentine Day Jokes More Valentine Day Jokes

What's the difference between the calendar and you?

A calendar has a date on Valentine's day.

What's your emer- She said don't get her anything for Valentine's Day! 911: And you didn't?

No! 911: Placing you in protective custody.

Calendar Jokes More Calendar Jokes

Why did the man tear a page out of the calendar?

He wanted to take a month off.

Whats the difference between me and a calendar?

A calendar has dates.

Valentine Jokes More Valentine Jokes

What did the french chef give his wife on Valentine's day?

A hug and a little quiche.

What does a carpet salesman give his wife for Valentine's Day?

Rugs and kisses!