What's the difference between the calendar and you?

A calendar has a date on Valentine's day.

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between a women's doctor and a kick returner?

The returner can catch a punt...

What's the difference between a lesbian and a straight girl?

Four drinks.

Date Jokes More Date Jokes

What's the best part of dating 29 year olds?

There's 20 of them. (More funny out loud)

Why did this OkCupid user never go out on a date?

A. "I couldn't imagine a date could be interested in knowing about me more than this website"

Valentine Day Jokes More Valentine Day Jokes

What kind of flowers do you never give on Valentine's Day?

Cauliflowers!

What does a carpet salesman give his wife for Valentine's Day?

Rugs and kisses!

Calendar Jokes More Calendar Jokes

What's the difference between the calendar and you?

A calendar has a date on Valentine's day.

How is it May already?

Day coming up tomorrow where people who don't know how calendars work tweet.

Valentine Jokes More Valentine Jokes

What's in a name?

A rose by any other name would smell as sweet. But, if roses were called "herpes" they'd make terrible Valentine's Day gifts.

How do you kiss a girl on valentines day?

You use tulips.