When do you use duct tape on a duck?

When he's quacked.

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Use Jokes More Use Jokes

Why did the plant say after being watered?

I'm not hungry exactly, but I could still use a light snack".

Why does Luke Skywalker never have trouble getting laid?

Because he always uses the force.

Duck Jokes More Duck Jokes

What kind of beast is it you hear?

A duck. ... with hiccups.

Why does duck taste better than turkey?

Because turkey is just poultry in comparison.

Quack Jokes More Quack Jokes

What did did the mother duck say to her duckling?

A: "If you don't behave, I'm gonna quack you one."

Who gave the Liberty Bell to Philadelphia ?

Must have been a duck family A duck family Didn't you say there was a quack in it !

Duct Tape Jokes More Duct Tape Jokes

What is the best thing about duct tape?

It turns no no no into mm mm mmmm.

Who says you can't make someone love you?

I've got a bottle of Scotch, some duct tape and a fresh batch of cupcakes, that beg to differ.