Where do fortune tellers buy their clothes?

Sears.

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Where is the best place to buy computer software?

Washington C.D

Why did the fishermen buy a new pole?

Just for the halibut.

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What kinds of clothes do protons wear?

Plus sizes!

What did the disappointed smoker get for Christmas?

Clothes but no cigar...

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Why did the man hit the fortune teller when she started laughing?

A: He was striking a happy medium.

Where do fortune tellers keep the fortunes?

Crystal balls deep made this up.