Why did Mr. Steaks decide he would take his wife's surname?

Because he didn't want his daughters to be called Ms. Steaks.

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Why do they ask you if you want paper or plastic at the supermarket?

Because baggers can't be choosers.

Why is fruit so expensive?

I want some raspberries, not the tears of Jesus.

Decide Jokes More Decide Jokes

Why did the Soviets decide to be Russian?

Cuz they got tired of Stalin.

Why did Jared decide to gain all of his weight back?

The mall is hiring new Santas.

Steak Jokes More Steak Jokes

What makes you think this is steak?

While I stroked his thigh with a knife.

Why did the rancher stop attending poker night with his marijuana smoking steers?

The steaks were getting too damn high.

Daughter Jokes More Daughter Jokes

What do you do if your daughter starts smoking?

Slow down and use lube.

Whatcha doing on the PC?

Daughter: Looking at peckers. M: WHAT ! D: Science project on chickens. M: Oh. D: You walked RIGHT into that.