Why did the Carpenters wife leave him?

Because he was screwing around.

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Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

Why did you leave me here all alone?

Where o where are you tonight? Why did you leave me here all alone? I searched the world over and thought I found some one You met a zombie and pblblthpth you were gone.

What do all 'Tickle Me Elmo' toys receive before leaving the factory?

Two test tickles.

Screw Jokes More Screw Jokes

How many skateboarders does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Two. One to screw it in and one to film it. One, but it takes him fifty tries.

How many James Pattersons does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Only one, but he'll just hire a ghostwriter to do it for him.

Carpenter Jokes More Carpenter Jokes

What's the difference between Jesus and other carpenters?

Jesus may actually return some day.

Who was the first carpenter ever?

Eve, she made Adam's banana stand.

Carpenter Wife Jokes More Carpenter Wife Jokes

Why did the carpenter's wife leave him?

He was screwing around when he was supposed to be nailing her.

Why did the Carpenters wife leave him?

Because he was screwing around.