Why did the husband bring his wife's sick dog to the salon?

He was trying to get her pedicure.

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Try Jokes More Try Jokes

Why is Yoda Programming full of exceptions ?

Because there is no try.

Why did the University of Oklahoma researcher stay awake every night?

He was trying to find a cure for insomnia.

Bring Jokes More Bring Jokes

Why did Tiger Woods bring three socks instead of two?

In case he got a hole in one.

What do you get if you cross a labrador and a tortoise ?

A dog that will run to the shop to get your paper and bring back last weeks paper !

Husband Jokes More Husband Jokes

What is your sin, child?

My husband and I are arguing That's very common. ...about my boyfriend.

Why did Yewtree arrest the husband-to-be at the celebrity wedding of the year?

They wanted to make sure he'd never been a groom.

Salon Jokes More Salon Jokes

How did the Manicurist feel after her salon was robbed?

Defiled.

What's the perfect name for a salon run by a couple of lesbian nuns?

Scissor Sisters *ba-dum-tiss*

Pedicure Jokes More Pedicure Jokes

Why did the remorseful child-molester paint his toe-nails?

He thought it would be a pedicure. sorry.

How long is a pedicure?

2 feet.