Why is English such a hard language to learn?

Because it's

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Why does it take pirates so long to learn the alphabet?

They're stuck at C for years

What is every blonde's ambition?

A: To be like Vanna White and learn the alphabet.

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What's the difference between an American student and an English student ?

About 3000 miles !

What does a cab driver have in common with a pool cue ball?

The harder you hit them, the more english you get out.