How do you put a baby to sleep?

You rock them. What if it doesn't work? Use a bigger rock.

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Use Jokes More Use Jokes

How do you get a Mexican across the border using only math?

Carry the Juan

What body of water is used for writing?

The Apostrosea.

Sleep Jokes More Sleep Jokes

How do you get your wife to listen to every word without interrupting?

Talk in your sleep.

What does Bob Marley wear to sleep?

pa-jammins

Work Jokes More Work Jokes

How do you tell which truck is the mail truck?

It has huge balls on it. Credit goes to the 70 year old man who just came into my work and made my day.

Why was the NSA computer programmer late for work?

Because he got Snowden

Baby Jokes More Baby Jokes

How do you stop a baby from crawling around in circles?

Nail its other hand to the floor.

What is the difference between a baby and a onion?

No one cries when you chop up the baby.

Rock Jokes More Rock Jokes

Why do police officers sleep with two rocks near their bed?

With one he turns off the light, With the other he checks if the window is closed

How are women like rocks?

You skip the flat ones.

Big Rock Jokes More Big Rock Jokes

How do you put a baby to sleep?

You rock them. What if it doesn't work? Use a bigger rock.

Where's the best place to hide an elephant?

Dad: Where is the best place to hide an elephant? Me: I don't know, behind a big rock? Dad: In a tree silly. Me: In a tree? Dad: When's the last time you saw an elephant in a tree?