How do you sort out Ant and Dec?

Squash one and deal with the other later.

Previous Random Joke Next

Ant Jokes More Ant Jokes

Why does mama aardvark call her husband a cannibal?

Because he ate his ant for dinner!

How many ants does it take to rent a house?

Doesn't matter, ants can't rent a house

Sort Jokes More Sort Jokes

Why can't there be some sort of mathematic formula for making friends?

A squadratic formula, if you will.

What sort of drug does a duck use?

Quack cocaine

Deal Jokes More Deal Jokes

What I say: "Does anyone need anything from the store?

What I mean: "I'm off to smoke a bowl in my car so I can deal with all of you."

What's the deal with reddit being obsessed about puns?

I've never... META ... group of people so obsessed with puns before.. Fine, I'll leave :(:(

Dec Jokes More Dec Jokes

Why do computer programmers always confuse Halloween and Christmas?

Because Oct 31 equals Dec 25

Why do programmers always mix up Christmas and Halloween?

Because Dec 25 is Oct 31

Squash Jokes More Squash Jokes

What do monsters play when they are in the bus?

Squash.

Why did the vampire sit on a pumpkin?

It wanted to play squash.