What I say: "Does anyone need anything from the store?

What I mean: "I'm off to smoke a bowl in my car so I can deal with all of you."

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Smoke Jokes More Smoke Jokes

Why cant Mexicans smoke joints?

They aint ever got any papers

What does Michigan State football and Marijuana have in common?

They are both green and get smoked in bowls!

Car Jokes More Car Jokes

What did the Japanese soda say to Papa John after he crashed his car?

I'm really sodie pop.

Why do guitarists put drumsticks on the dash of their car?

So they can park in the handicapped spot.

Store Jokes More Store Jokes

Where do terrorists store their money?

In the West Bank

How do you keep your dog young for longer?

Terrible OC Keep them stored in some quality... pupperware!

Need Jokes More Need Jokes

How many protestors do you need to change a lightbulb?

Trick question. Protestors don't change anything.

Why is a sinking ship like a person in jail?

Because it needs bailing out.

Mean Jokes More Mean Jokes

What do you mean I can't identify as a television?

Just watch me!

What does your mother do for a living?

She sells shesells...I mean...Sea sells sea shells...dammit! She's...a beachside entrepreneur."

Deal Jokes More Deal Jokes

How does Michael J. Fox deal with his Parkinson's disease?

He just shakes it off.

What's the deal with airline food?

Buy 2 get 1 free

Bowl Jokes More Bowl Jokes

Why is a dance like a bowl of cereal?

They are both more enjoyable with dates!

What would the name on the cat's bowl be?

It would be 'Bowl' and all of your friends would leave you because you are an idiot and named your cat Bowl.