How does Vladimir Putin like his Thanksgiving turkey?

Nuked

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What will Putin be having for Thanksgiving dinner?

Turkey.

What did General Patton do on Thanksgiving?

He gave tanks.

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What did the U.S president say before starting WW3?

Nukes... You're fired!

Why did the nuke switch course?

Because a girl on the ground said "I have a boyfriend" later that day the nuke fell into depression

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Why is everyone afraid of Vladimir Putin?

Because Vlad is Putin everyone in their place. I'll let myself out.

What is Vladimir Putin's favourite Justin Timberlake song?

Crimea river

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How does Vladimir Putin like his Thanksgiving turkey?

Nuked

What's brown and white and flies all over?

Thanksgiving turkey when you carve it with a chain saw!