What are you doing, idiot?

me, to other drivers on the road "What are you doing, idiot " me, to myself, in all other situations

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Road Jokes More Road Jokes

Why did the bodybuilder stop in the middle of the road?

They ran out of juice!

Why did the chicken cross the road, roll around in mud, and cross again after being caught by the mafia?

Because he was a dirty double crosser.

Idiot Jokes More Idiot Jokes

What happened when the two lovers were watching a scary movie in a year when Valentine's day happened to fall on Friday the 13th?

Oh wait, nevermind. I'm an idiot...*

Where do idiots go on holiday?

Twitzerland.

Situation Jokes More Situation Jokes

What's the difference between woman's breasts and a box of matches?

The matches are made for adults, but kids constantly grab'em and play with them. The situation is quite opposite with breasts.

How many bassoonists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one but they'll insist on going through about 5 bulbs before they find one that suits this particular room and situation.

Driver Jokes More Driver Jokes

How can you say you don't have any outstanding tickets?

Driver: They're all in the glove compartment.

What did the New York Salmon say to the driver?

I'm swimming here!