What did the poor composer say to his friend?

I am baroque, can you lend me some money?

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Friend Jokes More Friend Jokes

Why are me and my friends so nosey?

Because we're pry mates.

Why did the lady with multiple personality disorder share her food with a friend?

Because Sharon is Karen.

Money Jokes More Money Jokes

How many Elvis impersonators does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

One for the money, two for the show.

Why is PBS asking me for money?

If I had money I wouldn't need to pretend crow migration habits are good entertainment.

Lend Jokes More Lend Jokes

What did the pope give up for lent?

His job.

Why can the Cornish always lend a hand?

They probably have a spare.