What did the pope give up for lent?

His job.

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Job Jokes More Job Jokes

Who gets the job of writing the fortunes in the cookies?

I want that job. I could really screw with some people.

Why couldn't Barbie get pregnant?

Because they cast Amy Schumer and Ken couldn't get the job done.

Pope Jokes More Pope Jokes

Why does the Pope kiss the ground when he gets off his plane?

You would too if you had to fly Alitalia.

What is the Popes favorite trick to do on a bike?

Papa-wheelie!

Lend Jokes More Lend Jokes

What did Mark Antony say to Van Gogh?

Lend me your ears

Why wouldn't the frog lend his hammer to the mushroom?

Because it's a toad's tool.