What did you ask to Santa Claus this year?

The other one answers: -Oh fifty dollars, like everybody else, why

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Answer Jokes More Answer Jokes

What's your answer?

whispers into microphone* Please help me, I don't even know these people

What did the judge say when a skunk entered the courtroom?

Answer: Odor Odor in the court!!!

Year Jokes More Year Jokes

What do you call a snowman who cons people?

A snowfake.

What's your five-year goal?

Me: Paid administrative leave.

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two! But don't ask me how they got inside there.

How'd you get that cut above your eye?

Me: *Remembering dropping my phone on my face* "STOP ASKING ME ABOUT FIGHT CLUB!"

Santa Claus Jokes More Santa Claus Jokes

Why is Santa Claus always so Jolly?

He knows where all the naughty girls live.

What do Santa Claus and Bill Cosby have in common?

They both know when you are sleeping.

Dollar Jokes More Dollar Jokes

What denomination are the coins in Super Mario Bros?

They're dollar coins, because a quarter is two bits, which means a dollar is 8 bits.

What's the difference between a Pound and a Dollar?

A dollar

Everybody Jokes More Everybody Jokes

How can you tell a blonde is being unfaithful?

A: Everybody in the neighborhood is going to the pharmacy for penicillin.

Where is everybody?

Everybody I don't know. All over the planet I guess.