What do my wife and a chest freezer have in common?

The exterior is hot, but its cold as ice inside.

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Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

Why doesn't Stephen Hawking need a wife?

Because he has his own shoulder to cry on. Edit: all credit goes to /u/Earleebird who posted it in a comment in /r/oldschoolcool

What do you call a chicken with no neck?

A Hic. ----- wife hit me with this one today. Remove the n. E. C. And k. From chicken and it spells hic. I'm sorry Reddit.

Cold Jokes More Cold Jokes

What were their names?

Hot and Cold.

What do you call a peanut with a cold?

Cashew! she was so proud of herself for making me laugh with this one.

Ice Jokes More Ice Jokes

What do a redhead and a freezer have in common?

They've both got ice on the inside.

What did Harry Potter order when he went to the bar?

Expecto-Patron-On-Ice