What does a monster do when he loses his head?

He calls a head hunter.

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Lose Jokes More Lose Jokes

What is the fastest way to lose pounds?

Leave EU.

What did the farmers daughter say when she lost her virginity?

Get off me dad your crushing my smokes!

Head Jokes More Head Jokes

What's black, white, and red all over and can't turn around in a narrow hallway?

A nun with a spear through her head.

What did the hat say to the hat rack?

You stay here, I'll go on a head

Monster Jokes More Monster Jokes

How do you stop a monster digging up your garden?

Take his spade away.

What do you get if you cross a monster with a flea?

Lots of very worried dogs.