What's the best way to lose some pounds?

Leave the EU.

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Lose Jokes More Lose Jokes

What do you call it when a hedge fund manager loses his job to a Watson inspired AI built by IBM?

It doesn't matter. We'll all be laughing too hard to care.

How did Jared Fogle lose so much weight?

because he chose from the kids menu

Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

What did the mother Buffalo say when her boy left for college?

BYE-SON!

What did EA give Sean Murray for a parting gift upon leaving EA?

Game dev lessons.

Eu Jokes More Eu Jokes

What's the best way to lose some pounds?

Leave the EU.

What did GB say to EU?

Peace out, EUROn EUROwn!

Good Way Jokes More Good Way Jokes

What's the best way to get chewing gum out of your hair?

Cancer...

What's the best way to get a youthful figure?

ANSWER: Ask a woman her age.

Pound Jokes More Pound Jokes

Why does the town pound keep animals in separate cages?

Cause otherwise they'd be going to pound town.

How do dog catchers get paid?

By the Pound!