What does the caller ID say?

Mom: It's a private caller. Dad: Don't answer that. We only pick up for ranks Lieutenant Caller and higher.

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Dad Jokes More Dad Jokes

What's the difference between your dad and this joke?

This joke will be back someday

How would you like to make a donation to our local orphanage?

Dad: yea sure yells up to me son, you live with this guy now!

Answer Jokes More Answer Jokes

How does Yo-Yo Ma answer the phone?

Cello?

What makes you think you can criticise American gun laws, sitting over there in the UK?

I was asked on an internet forum. "Because you're not allowed to take them on planes," I answered.

Pick Jokes More Pick Jokes

Who's there ! Ammon ! Ammon who ?

Ammon old hand at picking locks !

How many Brazilian national football players does it take to change a lightbulb?

No one knows - every time they pick one up, they end up giving it away.

Rank Jokes More Rank Jokes

Where does the Navy rank amongst the armed forces?

Submarines.

What would be different if men got pregnant?

Maternity leave would last for two years with full pay and morning sickness would rank as the nation's #1 health problem.