What happened to the performer who read poetry to terminally ill patients?

He suffered an elegiac reaction.

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What happened to the native man that drank 23 cups of tea?

He went home and drowned in his tea pee.

What happens when you mix a snowman and a vampire?

Frostbite

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What kind of dog suffers most from being inbred?

A hot dog

What does a menopausal Vietnam vet suffer from?

Hot flashbacks

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What's the difference between Lindsay Lohan and the newspaper?

Lindsay Lohan never reads the newspaper in jail, but the newspaper always reads "Lindsay Lohan in jail"

Why are you reading the last pages of your history book first ?

Pupil: I want to know how it ends !

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What happened to the performer who read poetry to terminally ill patients?

He suffered an elegiac reaction.

What is Little Finger's favorite thing about poetry?

Shtanzas"

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What did the circus owner say to the human-cannonball when the he wanted to retire?

How will I ever find another performer of your caliber? (Source: a dad on thanksgiving)

What happened to the performer who read poetry to terminally ill patients?

He suffered an elegiac reaction.