What happens when almonds die?

Diamond

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What happens when the Batman sees Catwoman?

The Dark Knight Rises.

What on Earth happened?

The doctor said, surprised. "I don't know, it started with a boil on my arse." the frog said.

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What did Kermit the Frog say after Jim Hensen died?

Nothing...

What's the difference between Jesus and the chicken that crossed the road?

Jesus died on the cross

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What happens when almonds die?

Diamond

What do you get when you cross peanuts and almonds?

Deez Nutz

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Why do we say dogs are man's best friend? Why not say dogs are man's and woman's best friend?

Because diamonds are a woman's best friend.

What do you call a line of diamonds on fire?

Hotline Bling.