What would you call the easter egg roll if Bernie Sanders became president?

Weekend at Bernie's.

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What do Lewinsky, Monroe, and Reddit have in common?

They all went down on a President.

What one noun, verb, and US President sums up a scientist's hopes and fears?

Grant.

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How do you know all Bernie Sanders' supporters are Harry Potter fans?

They all dress like Dobby.

Which insurance company does Bernie Sanders use?

Progressive.

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How many Bernie supporters does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

One to hold the lightbulb, and the rest of the world to revolve around them

What do you call a man with a flamethrower?

2. What do you call his first victim 3. What do you call his second victim 1. Bernie 2. Crispin 3. Ash

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How JokeExplainBot spent his weekend?

Explaining his wife.

What did you do on the weekend?

ME: I baked CW: Nice. What did you bake ME: Me