What would you call the easter egg roll if Bernie Sanders became president?

Weekend at Bernie's.

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Which US president is most responsible for unemployment in the US today?

Abraham Lincoln.

Why do you want to run for President?

Because walking wouldn't burn enough calories.

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Why does Bernie Sanders write in lowercase letters?

Because he hates capitalism.

Why does Bernie Sanders hate icebergs?

Because only the top 1% can stay above water.

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How many Bernie supporters does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

One to hold the lightbulb, and the rest of the world to revolve around them

Which states is Bernie most popular in?

Denmark, Sweden and Norway.

Weekend Jokes More Weekend Jokes

What'd you do this weekend?

I was shooting craps. "Oh you went to a casino " *flashback to blasting dog turds with shotgun* Um, yeah.

What did you do on the weekend?

ME: I baked CW: Nice. What did you bake ME: Me