How many US Congress members does it take to change a lightbulb?

Only one. They just hold it still and wait for the world to revolve around them.

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World Jokes More World Jokes

Who's the fastest tailor in the world?

Sonic the Swift Taylor

How many Aquarians does it take to change a lightbulb?

A: A hundred but they'll all be competing to be the one to change the bulb and bring light to the world.

Lightbulb Jokes More Lightbulb Jokes

How many monastic women does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None... they live an ascetic lifestyle and prefer to not use electricity.

How many Carpathians does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

I don't know, Vigo and see. (best read in Yanosh's voice)

Hold Jokes More Hold Jokes

How many theoretical physicists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Two. One to hold it in place, another to rotate the universe around it.

What do you call a statue holding some Mouthwash?

A gargoyle!

Change Jokes More Change Jokes

How many psychiatrist does it take to change a lightbulb?

Just one, but it takes a really long time, and the lightbulb has to want to change...

How many X does it take to change a light bulb?

N! One to change the light bulb, and n-1 to display stereotypical behavioral traits of X!

Wait Jokes More Wait Jokes

What if I draw a peanut on her napkin?

Wife: Please go wait in the car

How many egoists does it take to change a lightbulb?

One. They simply hold the bulb and wait for the world to revolve around them.

Revolve Jokes More Revolve Jokes

How manny women dose it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one she hokds the blub and the world revolves around her.

How many twists does a feminist need to screw in a light bulb?

None. They just grab it and the world to revolve around them.

Congress Jokes More Congress Jokes

Whats the difference between congress and parliament?

Ones filled with a bunch of baboons and the other just doesn't give a hoot during the day.

What's the difference between congress and a circus?

One is a Cunning array of Stunts...