How many theoretical physicists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Two. One to hold it in place, another to rotate the universe around it.

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Lightbulb Jokes More Lightbulb Jokes

How many children does it take to change a lightbulb?

I don't need a lightbulb when I have the furnace ready.

How many tourists does it take to change a lightbulb ?

A: Six: One to hold the bulb and five to ask for directions.

Screw Jokes More Screw Jokes

How many Honor Guards does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A: 22 one to screw it in 21 to shoot the bulb.

How many friendzoned guys does it take to change a light bulb?

None, they'll just keep complimenting it and get mad when it doesn't want to screw.

Hold Jokes More Hold Jokes

What do you call a Hispanic person holding a silenced weapon?

Puerto-RECON

Why are librarians so lonely?

They're always by them shelves Just wanted to see if that library joke checked out Sorry for all the library jokes, I'll put them on hold

Place Jokes More Place Jokes

What do you get when you place a Russian leader on a cracker?

Putin on the Ritz.

How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. They hold it in place and wait for the world to revolve around them.

Universe Jokes More Universe Jokes

Why did Steve Harvey announce Miss Colombia as the Miss Universe winner?

Because he couldn't pronounce Miss Philippines.

How many physicists does it take to change a light bulb?

Two! one to change the light bulb and the other to rotate the universe!

Rotate Jokes More Rotate Jokes

What did the mathematician say about vertical videos?

I'm sorry, but the video you filmed is imaginary. Please rotate your phone 90 degrees and try again.

Why would anyone want to study the Earth and how it rotates?

I guess that some people just want to see the world turn

Theoretical Physicist Jokes More Theoretical Physicist Jokes

How many theoretical physicists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Two. One to hold it in place, another to rotate the universe around it.

How many theoretical physicists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to hold the bulb and one to rotate the universe.