Where the hell are u?

ME: Well...u know that shop where u saw that ring you love W: OMG YES M: I'm catching Pokemon near there

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Know Jokes More Know Jokes

What's the difference between this morning and your daughter?

Boss: I don't know. Guy: I'm not coming in this morning!

Why are campers so predictable?

You know they're in tents.

Catch Jokes More Catch Jokes

What sort of net is useless for catching fish ?

A football net !

How do you catch a green elephant?

Paint him red and catch him with the red elephant trap.

Pokemon Jokes More Pokemon Jokes

How do you know the name of a Pokemon?

It will tell you.

What do you call a Pokemon with breasts?

Rattata.

Love Jokes More Love Jokes

What was the favorite food of the thrifty Italian who loved contractions?

A pasta free.

What is your location?

Me: And you're to blame 911: Pardon Me: You give love a bad name 911: I'm hanging up

Shop Jokes More Shop Jokes

Why does Meek Mill avoid shopping on Black Friday?

Because the stores advertise "Back to Back" savings.

Why should you not shop for plywood?

You'll get bored.

Hell Jokes More Hell Jokes

Why is heaven a paradise for the common man?

Because all the politicians are in hell.

How many stoners does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

I don't know, I just set the bulb down somewhere, now I can't find it. Where the hell did the bulb go?

U. Jokes More U. Jokes

What did the DNA say to the RNA?

What are U doing here?

How many women have u slept with?

Husband: Only you, Honey. With everyone else, I was awake.