How many women have u slept with?

Husband: Only you, Honey. With everyone else, I was awake.

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Sleep Jokes More Sleep Jokes

What is the hardest part about sleeping with twenty one year olds?

There is twenty of them

What has a mouth but never speaks, Has a bed but never sleeps, And has legs but never walks?

amp;nbsp; A mute, crippled insomniac

Woman Jokes More Woman Jokes

What's the difference between a woman and a toilet?

The toilet doesn't insist on cuddling after you drop your load in it.

Whats the first thing a woman does when she gets to the battered shelter?

The dishes if she knows whats good for her.

Husband Jokes More Husband Jokes

What is 10 years with me?

Wife:What is 10 years with me Husband:A second. Wife:What is $1000 for me Husband:A coin. Wife: Ok give me a coin. Husband:Wait a second

What size bed comfortably fits a married couple?

Twin. Because the husband has to sleep on the couch.

U. Jokes More U. Jokes

How does a poor man watch TV?

with binoculars. u know, he has to watch whatever the neighbours are watching.

How do u tell the population of a small native village?

throw a bunch of pocket change in the middle of town. How do u tell who is the richest person in that village? Find the person who gathered the most change.

Honey Jokes More Honey Jokes

What's the difference between zombies?

Q: What's the difference between zombies? A: Zombies make honey, and zombies don't.

What'sApp Me: Mom, what's for dinner?

Mom : typing ... *gets married* *have kids* *gets old* *dies* *goes to hell* Mom: Fish, honey!