Why couldn't the man open a fish and herb shop?

Because he didn't have the thyme or the plaice.

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Man Jokes More Man Jokes

What did the man say after Michael Jackson stole his coat?

Hey that's mycoat Jackson!

How man hipsters does it take to change a lightbulb?

It's an obscure number, your probably never heard of it.

Open Jokes More Open Jokes

What did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas?

I don't know, he hasn't opened his presents yet.

How do you hide an elephant in a fridge?

You remove his slippers and open the door . You put him inside. You close the door and take the slippers away.

Thyme Jokes More Thyme Jokes

What do you get when you mix olive oil, lemon juice, rosemary, thyme, salt, pepper and marijuana?

Cheech Marinade!

Why was the chef mad?

He had all the money in the world, but no thyme.

Plaice Jokes More Plaice Jokes

What's the difference between a flatfish and a good woman?

The fish doesn't know it's plaice.

What did the boy fish say to his girlfriend ?

Your plaice or mine' !